The Mom, Christele (niece of man whose house we are staying in), had uterine cancer in her early 20's but she and her husband really wanted children of their own. They spent over 10 years researching options and working through legal issues, finally entering into an American surrogacy arrangement. Happily, the surrogate mom (Gail) got pregnant with the first round of IVF. Surrogacy is illegal in France, however it is legal to bring biological children carried via surrogate into the country. You can imagine how difficult this must have been, how many false starts, etc. As it turned out, Gail was actually their case manager at the Surrogacy agency that they were working with. She fell in love with Christele and Frank and after some thought offered to carry their children. You can also imagine that the amount of $ they spent on this was astronomical (trips to US for every blood test for example as the IVF lab in the US could not accept results from a French lab). They are quite well off (they run a company that imports paper products such as napkins, pizza boxes, etc) so they could afford it. They had a running joke with their friends once the kids were home that they went to the US to look into a pizza box deal and came home with two babies. This is because, for all that time, they didn't tell ANYONE about their plans except their closest confidants (a British couple living in France who could provide emotional support and English translations) and thus the babies were a surprise to everyone in their community.
So, their twin were born in the US and thus are US citizens. However, per Texas law, the babies became legally theirs midway through the pregnancy and they are the twins legal parents in every way. The kids are not French citizens in any way and would have to revoke their US citizenship in order to become French citizens. I asked about healthcare and social security and such. For their childhoods, the twins will be covered under their parents for healthcare, etc. After that, it will actually get complicated unless they have no periods of unemployment after university.
Christele and Frank have a continuing and loving relationship with the Gail and her husband (Dr. David-he is an ER Doc). Although not a legal requirement the two families have decided to treat the situation like an Open Adoption thus they see each other around once a year, send lots of gifts and pictures, etc. In fact, the twins very first drawing got sent to Gail back in Texas and she in turn sent a photo of herself next to the drawing which is hanging on her wall. The twins parents have that photo in their brag book of the kids! They even called Gail while we were visiting so we could say hello. It is clear that they consider her true family and it was quiet amazing to learn about their story.
Luckily they had invited Joyce, the woman who had been their confidant, as well as their English teacher to come over during our visit so we could talk without a language barrier. I explained that we had looked into Surrogacy and IVF and understood what they had to go through and how wonderful it was that they had a successful outcome. We also talked about birth stories in general, c sections, vbacs, water births, etc. Its funny how once kids come into the picture, nothing is taboo.
So here they are, two French people, living in a gorgeous house in a small village with two and a half year old twins who are biologically theirs but who are not French citizens. They have two of EVERYTHING and its pretty cute to see it all set up. Though the kids share a bedroom (that like many a nursery had a blowup mattress set up for Mama to crash on) they even had two playrooms which delighted Lilah after being cooped up for much of the past month. She celebrated her freedom by twice standing up for 10 seconds without holding onto anything and by refusing to take a nap even though she was offered Alenas (the girls name is Alena!) crib to sleep in.
Christele and Frank are two of the most generous people I have ever met who not only stuffed us full of desert, champagne and coffee but also sent us home with one of those fancy fenced in play areas ("We have two!"). They also kept asking if we needed clothes, hats, snow suits, shoes, binkies, etc. Frank even offered to follow us home since it was dark and he didnt want us to get lost (we told him no thank you since we had GPS).
All in all a terrific day. We, of course, invited them to come stay with us in El Cerrito next time they come to the US to visit Gail and I really hope they take us up on that offer. Their English speaking friends were also very interesting people and Christele's mom (Renes sister) also joined us for the day and was a doting Grandmother to be sure. She is a local celebrity as she is the Mayor of her village.
Anyway, tomorrow we head to Paris and will be visiting a friend from my New Moms group who I believe is only a few hours older than Lilah. It will be a nice reunion! Here are some photos from today.
Lilah's first French boyfriend (is actually American)
We will need to get her a tunnel when we get home. Kid loves them!
Love the matching leather chairs!
Twins are double the cuteness
No bad song today but here is a picture from when we were in Le Puy-En-Velay.
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